-Had I known how to save a life.

I should write in here more often.

I got three new shirts! They are what I consider as my "new style" and they are absolutely amazing. I got them at Ross for eight dollars each, that's why I cracked down and gave in to my burning desire. =] I've found that it's a lot easier to spend money when you have a silvery/sparkly piece of plastic rather than actual green moo-lah. *shrugs* but oh well, I don't regret it, and hopefully I won't when I go to Utah for Spring Break!!

Hm.. speaking of Spring Break, I'm so excited that I can actually go down there! DQ is amazing now. =] Even more so than before. I requested it and I talked to Amanda [one of my managers] to see if it was "approved or whatever" and she said that since I requested it I would get it off.

Speaking of work :D I am still front register. It's alright though, it's not that bad, not that good. I'd rather be working there than in the icecream making part of it. Cause they like never get a break. When there aren't any customers and they aren't going crazy back there, they are restocking, cleaning, etc. Sounds like insanity! But lately it's been funner because I will help out with the food expediting duties [taking the food out to customers] and whatnot.

Sophie just left today. We had so much fun!! and Irene was hilarious! Yesterday, We went to Far West Boutique cause Irene wanted to try on wedding dresses and Cassandra [one of the girls I take to Team Read who's hilarious] and Sophie and I wanted to try on prom dresses and such. And I tried on some pretty ones and then I totally tried on a wedding dress! I saw it on the rack so after the evil nagging lady told me to wash up I did. ['wash up' geez I sound like Dad!] It was beautiful! It had this amazing beaded bodice all the way from the capped sleeves to my waist and then it like poofed out like a cinderella dress, and then little poofs would gather with a pearl here and there and then there was a pretty train. it was over six hundred dollars with everything with it.. and well.. it was ALREADY PAID FOR! I didnt' notice it until I was taking it out of the thing and Irene hesitated and was like.. well we'll just be careful with it and so we were like whispering the whole time in there it was hilarious! Pictures of it are on Sophie's camera not mine [cause mine died *pouts*] I felt like Cinderella. It was amazing. *dreamy sigh* We went to Ross Dress for Less cause that's the main store Sophie wanted to go in and I totally bought those amazing shirts there.

Okay I'm sick of going step-by-step. The point is I felt like a jerk because we had no time to go to the mall and it was sad!

Oh geez, and Saturday night Cassandra spend the night because well the plan was: We were going to pitch a tent in the backyard and sleep in it and wake up at like 5 or 5:30 and go over to Heidi's house and 'abduct' her for her birthday. But instead we just stayed in my bedroom and dressed up with makeup, hair and wigs and creepy masks all night, made the mistake of sleeping for an hour and then we couldn't get back up so we just kept sleeping.

To make up for it, this morning we told Heidi that we were going to be at her house to pick her up for breakfast at like 6:15 or 6:30 but secretly me and CAssandra were planning to show up early at her house dressed in masks and pantyhose and such, and kidnap her. so we did and she was like "Wait let me get a bra!! I need shooess!" and then when I stuffed her in the very very back she's like "not a trunk!" and we were like "it's not a trunk" in our manvoices. it was hilarious. She was already awake though but it was still grand. We handcuffed her and stuff and everything. But she totally knew it was us and she was like " I totally should have expected this" Because she knew that we were going to get her on Sunday and we never did. So we went back to Cassandra's house and made waffles and whatnot.

Ugh I was so sick today it sucked.

Ooh! I might not be lactose intolerant beacuse I had like half of a large brownie earthquake blizzard and NOTHING. happened. it was amaziing. adn I've had some dairy since then so I've been good.

But I've been experiencing the capital C for like two weeks so it finally caught up with me and I had a huge bout of the big D.
ya catch me?

My body sucks sometimes.
I really want to get a new bathing suit! Maybe I'll get a cute one in Utah with the paycheck I don't have left *Scrunches up face*

We should brainstorm a rough list of things we want to do, eh,, ehhh?? So are you moved into that condo yet? Is it the one with the lighthouse room and stuff. I wasn' thate huge of a fan of it. I haven't talked to you in awhile, sadly!

I've been doing a lot of choir performances and whatnot. At the end of May we're going to Seattle for like four days to shop and to watch West Side Story and I really want to buy a pretty cocktail dress to wear there!

It's late. I have to head off to bed.

And I've realized I'm pretty boring, and I am monotone and I'm not that enthusiastic really.. but on the bright side, I can do a mean British accent!

try me. I'm the best. :D

this blog is random spurts of energy and exhaustedness. [is that even a word?]

the end.

One nocturnal son of a gun

I got my first paycheck on Saturday!! Yeehaw. But I am going to discipline myself. 10% goes to tithing of course. then 50% goes in my Gesa Savings Account. [maybe every other paycheck will go to my Hapo Savings account even though I only have five dollars in there. Then that could go toward something else.. like leisure and then Gesa will be my college one or something...] and then the 40% or whatever goes in my Checking account. Woo.

$159.80.

When you split it up all crazily it doesn't seem like MUCH. But it is not even a week of training [3 hrs. each training day] and a couple weeks of work. My normal paydays are the 5th and 20th. Isn't that weird?! Yeah, but I'm like totally pumped + enthused!!

The first thing I'm doing with it is getting my hair foiled. It's about time! [Or maybe I'll just get my hair foiled in Utah?] Cause there's not a whole lot I can spend with a little over 70 bucks for clothes. Ohh.. how I want clothes. Man I wish I was rich. All my newest clothes are all worn and kinda stretched out and stuff. *pouts* Eh whatevs. I'll figure SOMETHING out.

Headache. + extra abdominal pain = eeeehhh.

I am so freaking busy lately IT'S INSANE!
feel like asking me about it? Expect to receive a few paragraphs of biased reponses.

P.S. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eiiU-Fky18s Go and watch that music video.

To be quite honest,

it honestly pisses me off when people can't//don't know how to do their make-up right. rawwwwwr.!ASDKFJ


Watching: The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants

Doing: Homework >.<

thank freaking goodness for the 2 hr. late start. but still AH!

Dad had to forge James's signature for Pam's birthday card.


Puahahhaa.

Well I guess didn't have to.. but sure did!!

blah

I've wasted my entire day.

I've just been watching Buffy the Vampire Slayer and some television, although I DID take a shower, so that's an improvement.

I feel so.. bl;aksjd blhahh ish.
empty.


I feel myself sinking.
and i don't know why.

'Picture This:'

Marisha Perry
2/14/07
Picture This:



My sister Kristin took this photo in the spring of last year in Ketchikan, Alaska. It was taken from her in-law’s back porch. Right behind their house, with the sun setting behind some Alaskan Islands and the gorgeous sky reflecting off of the cold, Pacific, Ocean. Many people think of Alaska as very gloomy and boring. It may seem earthy, natural and dismal from the surface, but deep down, it’s truly exotically, beautiful, and it can and will surprise you. I visited this past summer. Time isn’t of much essence there. The sun goes down for a few hours in the summer, and then it’s right back up again. Time waits for no one in Alaska.

This picture definitely captures the inner beauty Alaska holds, that so many people take for granted. When I look at this picture, I know that anything is possible. There are more than just two choices or two paths in life. The world is not painted in black and white. It is painted with a countless amount of colors, turning it into a beautiful sunset. This picture fills me with determination and peace. I want to go back to Alaska, go hiking, listen to the water rush down a fall, have the rain wash away my pain and renew my soul. But at the same time, it makes me want to do something. To make a difference, and to dive with my whole heart into something. This picture proves that everything has a potential for beauty and boldness. Even if it’s only shown once, all that matters is that it was shown.

What's your list?

Marisha Perry
2/13/07 6th hr
To Cheer Myself Up I Could…

1) Sprint and scream at the top of my lungs in a wide, open field.

2) Drive fast to no place in particular while blasting music.

3) Buy myself something.

4) Impulsively go on a roadtrip.

5) Dress in my swimming suit, jump on the trampoline and suntan.

6) Finish a really good book.

7) Play sardines, kick the can, or hide and go seek in the dark.

8) Toilet paper someone’s house.

9) Make an elaborate meal and serve it.

10) Break as many laws as possible in one night.

11) Do the chinese fire drill even if I’m by myself.

12) Order just a water at a fast food drive-thru.

13) Watch a good movie.

14) Hang out with my friends.

15) Play Pump It Up.

16) Paint my nails.

17) Organize my room.

18) Use a coupon.

Flashback

Marisha Perry
2/9/07 6th hr
Flashback

“Oh my gosh!” I cannot believe we are actually here! It’s only noon! And we are going to see Death Cab tonight!” I giddily exclaimed.

“I know! I wasn’t even sure goin to Sasquatch Festival would even work out.” Nicole stated.

“Too bad we have to wait in these stupid lines.” I groaned. We moved slowly down the muddy trail closer to the entrance.

“Oh sweet, I can see the Wookie Stage!” Scott announced. I was jumping with excitement, trying to see it from his height.

“Who are we going to see first again?” I anxiously inquired.

“Big City Rock,” Katy answered.

“I looked them up on Myspace, and they’re not bad!” Scott expressed. We let the badged men look through our bags and collect our tickets. Random people were standing to one side, slapping guests’ wrists. What is that? I wondered to myself. I walked over to investigate.

“Ooh, oh my gosh!” They’re giving out ‘Tobacco Smokes You’ slap bracelets!” I burst out. I ran over and offered the woman my forearm and with a decisive clap it curled to my wrist.

“Okay, let’s head over to the Yeti stage” Someone decided. Maybe ten or so people were already there.

“Spot up front! Hurry, before more people come and someone else steals it!” Nicole screamed and took off in the lead. I grabbed the warm links of the metal fence about fifteen feet away from the famous band, wedged between Nicole and this short, thin girl that couldn’t stop moving her body or wagging her bobbly head. Big City Rock was welcomed on stage.

“Ooh, they’re pretty hot!” I shouted to Katy and Nicole, referring to the band members. They introduced themselves and started playing. I hadn’t really listened to them before today, but I danced along, as much as I could with the limited amount of space I could fit in. After the third repeat I had it down - “I am just a man, man in a city, city in state, state in a country, a country in a world, part of a system, drivin’ through the city, stereo is on. People going everywhere, people getting nowhere, with a will to carry on.” I connected with the musicians. A few songs later they sang “I Believe In You” and every few times the song mentioned “with you” The lead vocalist and guitarist, Nate Bott stared into my eyes, sang and pointed right to me! I jumped up and grinned back.

After they were done with their songs, we didn’t stick around. We all ran off, trying to find their CD and exploring the T-shirt store. We had some down time, evaluated and decided who wanted to see who. Brad and Emily were going to see Matisyahu, while Katy, Scott, Nicole and I would hang out at the Wookie Stage watching We Are Scientists, and then all meeting up at Clap Your Hands, Say Yeah. And then from there, hang out at the main stage for the rest of the bands, until midnight. Having some down time, we walked around, becoming familiar with the place.

We walked over to the mainstage getting in the lower area, evidently the mosh pit, arriving early for the Arctic Monkeys. While we were waiting, I had to the endure the unpleasant musical “talent” of Pretty Girls Make Graves that I was definitely not fond of. We inched our way to the front of the crowd, and then The Arctic Monkeys came on. The crowd went wild. After the second song, moshing was inevitable. I was bounced and knocked around, hair, clothes, limbs, shoes tangling and colliding with strangers that were in my personal space. Someone’s elbow tried to jab through my brain, and the back of someone’s head hit me square in the eye. But I didn’t let that stop me. I immersed myself in the emotion of the moment, listening to the lyrics, jumping up and down, sweating from probably every pore. The sun beat down on our faces, making the moshing pit a sweat lodge. I clung to the back of Claire, we were separated from everyone else in our group. I had to keep my arms up, so I could pass along the next person that decided to crowd surf right above me.

I could go on and on for hours about this day. I could explain that Katy and I got seperated from the group for an hour or so, talk in detail about listening to Death Cab live, or that a few drunks interacted with us when we were separated from the guys. It was pretty intense, but it was one of the best days I have ever experienced throughout my life thus far. If I could relive any moment, it most definetly be would be attending Sasquatch Festival last year. But I’ve found one problem. I didn’t realize it that perfect day, but I found out not even a week after. Four words: Seeing Adam Brody live. He is the drummer for Big Japan, and Seth Cohen in The O.C.. But last spring, I hadn’t really heard about Big Japan. I didn’t know much about it, and I didn’t know he was in it. I knew he was the drummer in some band, but I never would have imagined that he was at the Gorge, in Washington, playing at Sasquatch Festival! Not only that, but he came on right after Big City Rock. I was in the front row. The closest anyone could get. If I wanted to, with the right velocity, I was so close I could have spit on the lead singer’s shoes.

I am a huge fan of Adam Brody, with he being such a talented actor and so easy on the eyes. And knowing that I would have been twenty-five feet from him, seeing him in the flesh, tears me inside out. If I could go back in time, I definetly would have stayed at the Yeti stage, soaking he and his music up, rather than pointlessly walking around. Now, that I’ve seen pictures online of other people at Sasquatch standing by him after his show, it kills me to know that that could have been me!

Just a few quotes that represent me & my life:

Marisha Perry
2/8/07 6th hour
In Other Words

“There is nothing like returning to a place that remains unchanged
to find the ways in which you yourself have altered.”
- Nelson Mandela

“All that we see or seem is but a dream within a dream.”
- Edgar Allen Poe

“Sorrow is tranquility remembered in emotion.”
- Dorothy Parker

“You can see only as far as your headlights
but you can make the whole trip that way.”
- E.L. Doctorow

“lovers alone wear sunlight.”
- E.E. Cummings

“There are two tragedies in life.
One is to not get your heart’s desire. The other is to get it.”
- George Bernard Shaw

“The soul can split the sky in two,
And let the face of God shine through.”
- Edna St. Vincent Millay

“Fill what is empty,
empty what is full,
and scratch where it itches.”
- Tallulah Bankhead

“Pain is inevitable, suffering is optional.”
- Greta Randolph

“No man who has once heartily and wholly laughed
can be altogether, irreclaimably bad.”
- Thomas Carlyle

“Wouldn’t it be loverly.”
- Alan Jay Lerner

'My Personal Symbol'

Marisha Perry
2/8/07 6th hr.
Personal Symbol

My Snowball. He is my baby, my best friend, my comforter. He is my fuzzy baby, bear cub. His fur was once a pretty, beige, cream-color. He has a squishy black nose and big, beautiful, black eyes. They remind me of olives that come in a can. My parents got him for me in Korea when I was five. I used to take him everywhere with me - To friends’ houses, vacations, sleepovers, probably even the grocery store. He was one of those bears that probably had a display saying “squeeze me” pointing to the paw. Everytime I would push it, he made a growl noise. Not a scary one, but a ‘I’ll always protect you’ one. It would get me every time. But I pushed it too much, and it wore out. Every time our family went on vacation, even if it was just for a day, I would manage to smuggle Snowball along with me. I would shove him into my pillow and whip him out and plop him on my lap for the car ride there. If my brother wasn’t sitting by me in the back, I would buckle him into a seat. At times, I even used him as a pillow. My family got so sick of it. They complained that he took too much room, I was getting too old for him and that it was ridiculous. I would just ignore them and hug him tighter. Even now, when we go on longer trips, I take him along. I’ve always said that he protected me from bad dreams. Any time I heard a suspicious noise in the mysterious dark, I would wrap my little arms around him, bury my face in his neck and feel okay about going to sleep. He made me feel safe, even in my dreams. I still believe that. Every point of devastation, I would run to him. He welcomed me with those big eyes, knowing what was going on, waiting for me, and accepting me for who I am. I would press my tear-stained face into his soft, thick fur and know it was okay to sob.

Even now, at age sixteen, that doesn’t change. But after about eleven years of use, he has imperfections. He doesn’t growl anymore. When I squeeze his right paw, it just makes a little clicky noise. His paw has been like this for years, and when I’m bored, I will sometimes absently squish it over and over. He’s not a pretty beige cream color. He is a dark tan, with the hint of the old color by his ears, neck and paws. I guess somewhere along these years, I must have spilled something on him, because a few locks of his fur are black and stiff. His stuffing is coming out. Somehow his back got torn open. I don’t know why, but I haven’t bothered stitching him back up. Instead, I’ll play with the fishing line coming out of his back, and shove my hand in the stuffing, playing with it. I guess I loved him too hard. But he’s never wronged me and has loved me unconditionally.

Snowball represents life. In my childhood, I was pure and innocent, judging no one. I was accepting to anyone who came into the picture. I was my Mom’s baby, my friends’ best friend or comforter. As I’ve grown up, I’ve changed. I’ve gotten hurt along the way, lost something special, been torn apart; tainted, I can never be the same. But throughout my journey, I have learned to love others’ imperfections, as they have come to accept and love mine. Instead of trying to fix them, I’ve realized that my flaws make me who I am, make my friends who they are. It would be selfish to try and patch something up or fix what has been “wronged”. But no matter how I’ve changed or grown, one of the best things in this world is that some things never change.

I am delivered. [the more I look at the word, the less sense the spelling makes.]

Indentations on paragraphs and such doesn't work in blogger. That's kind of frustrating me at the moment, especially with my Creative Writing pieces. I guess I'll just have to separate them by irritatingly pushing the 'Enter' button. I'm posting more pieces up.

Oh and the "spiritual" quotes and such, were from General Conference October 2006 talks, because I have Seminary make-up work from. well .. last semester [haha woops] and it's not like I ever watched General Conference anyway *shrugs*

Listen to this song:
Delivery by Cherie Call it makes me cry.

Honesty

Overrated? I think not. [most of the time :/ ]

Proverbs 12:22 - "Lying lips are abomination to the Lord: but they that deal truly are his delight"

"There will never be honesty in the business world, in the schools, in the home, or anyplace else until there is honesty in the heart."

"Honesty should be among the most fundamental values that govern our everyday living."

"When we are true to the sacred principles of honesty and integrity, we are true to our faith, and we are true to ourselves."

both quotes by Richard C. Edgley

_{After reading this I feel slightly guilty..}

Elder David S. Baxter [mostly]

FAITH:
"Faith fuels hope. Our perspective changes; our vision becomes clearer. We begin to look for the best, not the worst, in life and in others. We gain a deeper sense of life's purpose and meaning. Despair gives way to joy."

"Faith is then nurtured as we allow ourselves to believe. Like all other virtues, faith is strengthened as we practice it, as we live and act as if our faith were already deep. Faith is the product of righteous desire, belief, and obedience. "

Quoted: "If there is a God, and if thou art God, wilt thou make thyself known unto me, and I will give away all my sins to know thee.."

SERVICE:
"The answer lies in helping to solve the problems of those around us rather than worrying about our own, living to lift burdens even when we ourselves feel weighed down, putting our shoulder to the wheel instead of complaining that the wagons of life seem to be passing us by. "

"Stretching our souls in service helps us to rise above our cares, concerns, and challenges. As we focus our energies on lifting the burdens of others, something miraculous happens. Our own burdens diminish. We become happier. There is more substance to our lives."

CONSTANCY:
"There are days, perhaps even months and years, when life is just hard. We experience our fair share of adversity, heartache, loneliness, pain, grief—sometimes, it seems, more than our fair share. What to do when adversity strikes? There is only one thing to do. Stand steady and see it through. Stay steadfast, constant, and true"

"At these moments of crisis and challenge, some choose to abandon faith just at the time when it most needs to be embraced. Prayer is ignored at the very hour when it needs to be intensified. Virtue is carelessly tossed aside when it needs to be cherished. God is forsaken in the all-too-human yet mistaken fear that He has forsaken us."

Quoted: "We are troubled on every side, yet not distressed; we are perplexed, but not in despair"
"Persecuted, but not forsaken; cast down, but not destroyed."

OTHER:
"The challenges you face, the growth experiences you encounter, are intended to be temporary scenes played out on the stage of a life of continuing peace and happiness. Sadness, heartache, and disappointment are events in life. It is not intended that they be the substance of life. I do not minimize how hard some of these events can be. When the lesson you are to learn is very important, trials can extend over a long period of time, but they should not be allowed to become the confining focus of everything you do. Your life can and should be wondrously rewarding. ... That perspective keeps challenges confined to their proper place—stepping-stones to further growth and attainment. "
-Richard G. Scott